How to balance working and parenting as a single parent
Being a single parent is a challenging and demanding role, and it can be difficult to balance the demands of both. As a single parent, you are responsible for providing for your family financially, as well as taking care of your children and managing your home. As parents, we can often worry about whether we’re doing enough for our children, particularly during times when we are very busy or if they are feeling vulnerable. This can be overwhelming at times, and it can be easy to forget about yourself.
It's important to find a balance that works for you and your family. In this post, we give you a few tips to encourage you to keep focused on both you and your children’s happiness and health.
Ask for help
While it can sometimes be hard to ask for help, it’s important to ask friends and family members for support. Family life and managing the children day to day can be tough, particularly when doing it on your own. It’s often helpful to focus on what needs to be done and set out a plan in order of priority.
If your extended family members or friends reach out to you and offer help for a few hours, accept it. Stress and anxiety can develop over time, so avoiding it as best you can is important. If you don’t have a family network around you, consider reaching out to some community organizations or parent groups in your area to see if they can offer help and support.
One Family is a renowned Irish organization that supports and empowers single-parent families. They understand the unique challenges and realities that single parents face and offer a range of high-quality services to single-parent families such as counseling, support, guidance, and courses.
Getting Support
If you don’t have family living nearby, there are a variety of ways you can ask for help:
Reach out to community resources: many cities have community centers, churches, and other organizations that offer support for single parents. These resources may provide financial assistance, parenting resources or social support.
Contact government assistance programs: the Irish government offers a range of assistance programs for single parents, including financial assistance, healthcare, and education support. You can find more information about these programs on the Irish government website.
Seek support from friends and neighbors: don’t be afraid to ask for help from your friends and neighbors. They may be able to help you with childcare, errands, or other practical tasks.
Consider hiring a babysitter or nanny: if you have the financial resources, hiring a babysitter or nanny can provide you with some extra support and allow you to take a break from parenting responsibilities.
It’s important to remember that it’s okay to ask for help, and that you don’t have to go through this journey alone. Reaching out for help is a sign of strength and resilience.
Take time out for yourself
Finding the right work-life balance as a single mam or dad can be difficult but taking time out for yourself can help you to mentally and physically recharge and can encourage positive change both in your personal and professional life. If you can, consider asking a family member or friend to babysit for an hour or so whilst you go to the gym, go for a walk, or even take a relaxing bath.
By spending time alone or with others that make you feel good, you will not only de-stress, but you can also become happier and more energized overall. Taking time out of your busy schedule is important so whether you’re seeing friends or just want to do something alone, pop it into your schedule and get someone to look after the kids in advance.
Speak to your employer
It can be difficult to balance work and home life when you're a single parent, but the best advice we can give is to speak to your employer about your situation. Find out what your company policies are, be familiar with your employee rights, and following this, request a time to sit down with your manager to discuss options. This is the ideal opportunity to share your situation, the pressures you are under and what support you need from your employer that may help you and your family. You have the right to request flexible working from your employer and the Working Families website has fantastic advice and a letter template for your employer to help get you started: https://workingfamilies.org.uk/articles/sample-letter-to-request-flexible-working/
Set Boundaries and goals
Setting boundaries around work and home life will vary for each one of us depending on our job and family situation.
Sometimes it can be difficult to separate work and home life, especially if you work from home. While it can be difficult at times, especially when the children are sick, creating clear boundaries will ensure that you’re more productive at work and can focus on your children at home.
In addition to setting clear boundaries, you want to ensure you set goals too for both your home and work life. This will ensure that you're being the best parent you can be and making strides in your career too.
Your goals don't have to be crazy; they can be special to you such as creating time to make memories with your children or just making sure that you switch off from work at the end of the day.
Spend quality time with your children
When life is so busy, we can sometimes forget to switch off and spend much-needed family time with our kids. Spending one-to-one time can be of great benefit to you and your child, it’s finding the time that can be the tricky part. Consider taking time out of your schedule, when there is less pressure as this allows us to be present with our children and creates opportunities to encourage our children to talk and share their feelings too.
Ask the kids what they might like to do together as a family, it could be a walk in the park, going to the playground, reading stories before bed, visiting friends, going for a paddle in the sea, watching some movies, or even building a den. Quality time with your children doesn’t mean spending money, it’s all about making memories and doing something you can all enjoy.
Look after yourself
Single parenting is hard, there's no denying it. Between being the best parent you can be and working, focusing on yourself can sometimes come last on the list, but it’s one of the most important things you can do. Some benefits that can make it a little bit easier are eating a healthy, balanced meal each evening when you can, and take time out to factor in exercise and fresh air. You also want to ensure that you have a regular bedtime routine too as this can support you in having more energy, patience when needed, and less irritability with the kids.
Final thoughts
As a single parent, you will make a lot of sacrifices. It's a job that can test your patience at times but remember that you're not alone. Connecting in with other families that may be in a similar situation can be of great support.
There are several support groups and resources available for single parents in Ireland:
One Family: One Family is a national organization that supports and empowers single-parent families in Ireland. They offer a range of services including counseling, legal advice, and support groups.
Single Parents Ireland: This is an online support group for single parents in Ireland. The group offers a safe and supportive place for single parents to connect, share their experiences, and get advice and support from others.
Parents Plus: this is a program run by the Irish government that provides support and resources for parents and families, offering parenting courses and support groups.
Solas: Solas is a national training and development organization that provides a range of services for parents and families including support groups.
Local community centers and churches: many local community centers and churches offer support groups and resources for single parents. These groups can provide a sense of community and offer practical and emotional support.
Sometimes, work and family life will overlap, and that's okay. Finding a balance between the two that works for you and your family is key.